Well, today didn’t end up quite like I had planned, but it wasn’t bad…

Wednesday I will…

  • Eat a healthy breakfast. – Check!
  • Eat a healthy lunch. – Check!
  • Go to the gym and lift. – Had a change of plans.  Will explain in a minute.
  • Take the dogs for a run when I get home. – Change of plans, see below.
  • Make a healthy dinner for both of us. – I ate well.  I can’t speak for my husband since we had a “fend for yourself” night.

At our faculty meeting this morning, someone announced that there were a couple open spaces in the workforce-something-or-other-5k tomorrow.  So I snagged one!

With the new plan of racing tomorrow night, I decided to forgo the lifting and running for today.  I want to run this race to the best of my ability (Goal time = 26:21, which is an 8:30/mile pace), and don’t want to be sore or tired.

I have been very frustrated.  I haven’t really run well since my 18 miler, which was 6 weeks ago.  The week after that was my failed 20 miler (only made it to 17.5 with knee issues), then my DNF in the half marathon, and then since then I’ve been so sporadic.  I’m angry with myself that I’ve let my consistency disappear.  I’m angry that I’ve “failed” at so many runs, and just plain didn’t DO many of them too.  This isn’t something that I can take lightly.  And every time I don’t do what I should have done, I’m angry with myself.  Which makes me feel like a failure, which makes me disappointed, which makes it even harder to do what I need to do the next day.

Every morning I tell myself, today is another day to start fresh.  And usually things start out well.  But by the end of the day, plans have changed, or I just don’t feel up to it.  There always seems to be something that gets in the way, or some “good” excuse.  I need to stop making excuses and just do what I need to do.

Advertisements